- Felt Sense
- Inner Child
- Self Esteem
C asks: "When I feel I’m whelming up inside, like a watery, tearful emotional ‘aroma’ I can’t seem to be with it; and then later in the day it’s got so big, I end up crying my eyes out and it all gets released..."
You acknowledge the feelings that are there, and then one by one, imagine you are setting the feeling outside your body, somewhere close by... See where it would like to be put....
Living with uncertainty and not knowing in your life can be destabilising, leading to anxiety.
I have had times in my life when I didn’t know where I was going to live, or how I was going to earn a living. It felt scary, feeling the ground shifting under my feet. And right now we are living in uncertain times...
When you are Focusing, it helps to develop your capacity for awareness.
This deepens and enriches your Focusing and brings lasting change into your life.... You can find your awareness in your mind, in your heart or in your belly. You can look for it where it is most accessible, in external sensory awareness, or internal awareness.
It’s not easy to be with something that feels uncomfortable, and it’s also hard when you don’t know what it’s about, or why it is there.
It might be a feeling of tightness or constriction in the throat or chest, or any kind of physical sensation that causes discomfort...
Something in you is feeling discomfort and it is showing you through the symptoms of the painful body sensations.
Like many of us, when I am being with my anger, I find it very hard to get any kind of distance.
Mostly I am merged with it, and I can feel how I am experiencing it in my body. I might be getting a tight feeling in my shoulders or in my stomach area.
If you have overwhelming feelings of anger or rage, I suggest that you concentrate on ‘giving it lots of space’. By that I mean that you take time for yourself to really listen to it and acknowledge the intensity of feeling.
There are many factors that can get in the way of a fruitful inner dialogue, and I will address some of them here.
1. If the dialogue is based solely in your head and in your thoughts, and not taking account of what’s happening as a body-based inner process. Your body knows more that you are consciously aware of, so if you take time to pause and listen carefully, in those quiet moments something new can come to you...
I want to say how much I value Focusing in these difficult times.
It is giving me enormous support on a personal level.
I am sure that everyone can benefit as much as I do, even though you may already have support systems in place, such as mindfulness, meditation, support of family and friends, and connection with nature.
This is adapted from an interview I did recently with Amy McCormack for Thresholds, the quarterly professional journal of BACP Spirituality division.Focusing naturally lends itself to supporting spiritual practice by developing the capacity for grounded aware presence and empathy for yourself and others... When I am being in nature, I have a sense of connection.
When I am Focusing, I find that the more present I can be and the more grounded awareness I can bring to my Focusing, then the more my Focusing can flow. They are interconnected.
How many times do we say to each other, ‘take care’, or ‘take good care of yourself’, or ‘look after yourself’, usually as a way of saying goodbye?
Do we really take care of ourselves? Do you?
What often stops us is lack of time, or perhaps an unwillingness to slow down, pause and listen, and take the action that is needed.
Sometimes we may not listen because we don’t want to hear what our body tells us.