The practice of Focusing is very specific and precise, and yet the word ‘focusing’ has many meanings.
Here I am talking about Focusing as developed by Gene Gendlin, different from other uses of the word ‘focusing.
It’s easier for me to say what it’s not…
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If you feel stuck with something in your life, and you don’t know what to do
We all make decisions every day. Some are small and some feel big and difficult to make.
Sometimes life situations feel intractable and there’s no way out of it. Or maybe you feel stuck and don’t know what to do.
This is where Focusing can help.
Being with overwhelming feelings
C asks: “When I feel I’m whelming up inside, like a watery, tearful emotional ‘aroma’ I can’t seem to be with it; and then later in the day it’s got so big, I end up crying my eyes out and it all gets released…”
You acknowledge the feelings that are there, and then one by one, imagine you are setting the feeling outside your body, somewhere close by… See where it would like to be put….
Living with uncertainty
Living with uncertainty and not knowing in your life can be destabilising, leading to anxiety.
I have had times in my life when I didn’t know where I was going to live, or how I was going to earn a living. It felt scary, feeling the ground shifting under my feet. And right now we are living in uncertain times…
The Presence of Awareness
When you are Focusing, it helps to develop your capacity for awareness.
This deepens and enriches your Focusing and brings lasting change into your life…. You can find your awareness in your mind, in your heart or in your belly. You can look for it where it is most accessible, in external sensory awareness, or internal awareness.
When the body speaks through sensations
It’s not easy to be with something that feels uncomfortable, and it’s also hard when you don’t know what it’s about, or why it is there.
It might be a feeling of tightness or constriction in the throat or chest, or any kind of physical sensation that causes discomfort…
Something in you is feeling discomfort and it is showing you through the symptoms of the painful body sensations.
Dealing with anger
Like many of us, when I am being with my anger, I find it very hard to get any kind of distance.
Mostly I am merged with it, and I can feel how I am experiencing it in my body. I might be getting a tight feeling in my shoulders or in my stomach area.
If you have overwhelming feelings of anger or rage, I suggest that you concentrate on ‘giving it lots of space’. By that I mean that you take time for yourself to really listen to it and acknowledge the intensity of feeling.
When does having an active dialogue with an inner voice become a waste of time?
There are many factors that can get in the way of a fruitful inner dialogue, and I will address some of them here.
1. If the dialogue is based solely in your head and in your thoughts, and not taking account of what’s happening as a body-based inner process. Your body knows more that you are consciously aware of, so if you take time to pause and listen carefully, in those quiet moments something new can come to you…
The value of Focusing in these difficult times
I want to say how much I value Focusing in these difficult times.
It is giving me enormous support on a personal level.
I am sure that everyone can benefit as much as I do, even though you may already have support systems in place, such as mindfulness, meditation, support of family and friends, and connection with nature.
Focusing as a spiritual tool for counsellors
This is adapted from an interview I did recently with Amy McCormack for Thresholds, the quarterly professional journal of BACP Spirituality division.
Focusing naturally lends itself to supporting spiritual practice by developing the capacity for grounded aware presence and empathy for yourself and others… When I am being in nature, I have a sense of connection.
When I am Focusing, I find that the more present I can be and the more grounded awareness I can bring to my Focusing, then the more my Focusing can flow. They are interconnected.
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